I love you,
She is beyond smart, cute and darn it, I look so much like her. Tee Hee The photo is from Mother's Day, where the kids took me to Golden Corral and on the way out they all got cotton candy. You can kinda see D7 and J3 is in car seat, and yep that is a 15 passenger van.
My Epiphany came in church, good place right? Sunday School, the whole armor of God...yada yada, what?? I asked a question about being tired of fighting and putting on the armor, and Pastor says, Take a NAP! lol, I am thinking oh, I nap, I collapse in total exhaustion dude! He went on to talk about people that are super organize and fill every bit of time being busy, are usually depending on the flesh of themselves.
Did Pastor just publicly humiliate me? Did he say, Anne you are beyond organize, people envy your skills and you are totally fleshed out in this. Relax and enjoy life and serving God and your children. He didn't say my name or any of the extra words in italics, but dang, his words about organizing kept reverberated in my head, heart and spirit. I admit, I read organizing books and scoff at their silly ideas(cause mine are better), or pat myself on the back and go, oh go girl, you do that and better than this ol' author. Wow, it was a real eye opener. I talked with him afterwards, laughing and crying. I do not want to make my children freak-a-zoids. I want them to be good adults, but more so I want them to know me!
Now, please don't get all freaked and think I tossed out the calendar, my bra and dish detergent and began humming and just playing all day.
I actually erased my white board of times and chores and items to complete, and told the kids, I was making them all neurotic with my scheduling and lists and organization. I laughed and played a game with my oldest boy (kicked his butt like 6 times in a row) and we bantered and enjoyed each other. This is so huge right now, I can't even explain this one.
We saw a cicada, and could see it vibrate and make the whole area buzz with the noise. It was pure bliss, laughing outside and just enjoying my kids, instead of organizing them.
Can we (insert crazy question)? Sure, go ahead, try it. They were so amazed and laughed and said, Mo-om (2 syllables) that is silly. They boys all peed in the desert. That was beyond hilarious.
Today, after breakfast, we went again, my girls and I were together more and we talked and laughed as the boys ran ahead. I am taking more time to be with them, not time punching, but spending moments together.
I have to relax more, and enjoy the kids, because as I told a friend. I don't want the kids to remember my toilet clean, but that mom laughed and went with them in their memories.